Sunday 9 March 2014

Fix You

“And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone, but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you”

Fix You – Coldplay

I have always thought this song to be a bit of soppy ballad – the type of song which comes out near the end of the house party when everyone has had a bit too much to drink and are in the mood to belt out some meaningful song. In fact, most of Coldplay’s songs are on the receiving end of snide remarks about how slow and boring they can be and, to be fair, most songs which aren’t released as radio singles tend to be like this. A couple of months ago Fix You came on while I was listening to the radio and I guess I was in a music kind of mood, because my deciphering instincts kicked in and I had a bit of think about this song. I’ve had this song on my iPod as long as I can remember, but not until now had I had a chance to pull it apart in a blog.  

When I think about my life I can pinpoint areas where other people want to fix things about it. Usually it is something small, like the way I arrange my email folders at work or the way the use different cooking utensils at home, because I am lucky enough not to have something more serious in my life which needs fixing. I have witnessed, though, other people I know becoming focused on forcing change upon someone else with the intention of making them better. This comes from a place of love and a good heart, but usually ends a spectacular fail as it is difficult to know how to fix someone else. And it’s hard, because we want to help and hey, Coldplay said we should try.

But I don’t think jumping knee deep into someone’s personal problems is quite what should be taken from Fix You. It is the lines lights will guide you home / and ignite your bones / and I will try to fix you which initiated a different idea. To me it suggests that somehow we know we can never truly help someone fix himself or herself and we need to take a step back and allow that person to come to terms with their issues and insecurities. It suggests the best way to help is to let someone know they will have unconditional support and positive place to come home to, but you will not be the one to find the solution.

Perhaps my thoughts about this song stem from my personal knowledge that I could never fix someone. It’s not because I don’t want to or I don’t have time to or I don’t want someone to get better, it’s because I don’t think I have the tools or resources to do it. By all means come to me for support but know my way of trying to fix you will be to pass you on to someone better equipped. And I think in this way you are helping fixing someone more than you realize.